Okay you guys, it’s not everyday that I meet someone who has a heart just like mine. I swear this girl is my soul sister. She applied to be part of the tribe and when I read her application I knew right away that she was going to be an inspiration to you all. She is a bad ass. Let’s just get right into it because I can’t wait for you babes to meet her! Say hello to Liliana!
1. Three words to describe me:
Determined, Unapologetic, and Adventurous.
2. A little about me:
My name is Lily, I’m 30 years old, married to my best friend, a step mom to a rad little guy, a Cyber Warfare Officer for the military part time, a vulnerability management analyst for a fortune 5 company full time and I hold a Master ’s Degree in Cyber Security, and a Bachelor ’s Degree in Criminal Justice.
My Hobbies Include:
Riding my motorcycle. I ride a Harley Davidson, Iron 883 to be exact… It is a pretty bad ass bike. You can usually find me riding/bar-hopping on the weekends alongside my husband. I also love being outdoors, I love nature, and it’s so easy to lose sight of how magnificent the world is when working behind a desk all day. So, if there’s any sort of adventure and exploration, count me in! I love planning mini bae-cations to do some hiking, find waterfalls, kayaking etc. Nature truly does something to my soul that nothing else can. In addition to riding, or exploring the outdoors, I try to squeeze in a booty day at the gym any chance I get. I also happen to be big foodie, oysters are my favorite food ever! So trying new restaurant on date nights with my husband has become a constant for us. I genuinely get a thrill from new experiences and I’m also a bit of an adrenaline junkie so if it’s new and slightly dangerous you can bet it’s on my list of things to do this weekend.
3. What is a typical day like for you?
I have two types of typical days, the typical day where I’m just Lily, and the typical day where I’m a step mom. I’ll start with a typical day as Lily. I’m pretty sporadic, a roaming nomad of sorts so I tend to find myself on a lot of adventures on a day to day basis and not usually home. Mornings consists of me waking up and cuddling with my husband for about 20 minutes, sometimes longer if I can convince him life in bed is better than work (this usually works). After he pries himself out of my arms I walk over to my office. I’m lucky enough to work from home. Throughout the work day I provide information security and vulnerability management expertise to my various customers. I love my job, my team and the type of work I do, so my work days usually fly by. During lunch I hit the gym and make plans for after work. Depending on the day or weather, I find myself doing something outdoors, checking out a new restaurant, or taking a ride on the motorcycle with my husband.
My step son lives with us 50% of the time, so on our days with him my day consists of making sure my husband has the support and help he needs throughout his day. Most of what is mentioned above still takes place, but in a different way. The focus is on the little guy rather than on ourselves. My husband gets home around 4pm from picking him up and step mom mode kicks in. I’m usually in the kitchen cooking as they walk through the door. He loves my cooking (thank God, phew!) so I let him pick what’s for dinner and I get to it. Once dinner is done, we sit at the table together as a family and catch up. It’s very important to maximize our time with him so creating a solid example of what we want our family to be is priority. I really think consistency, schoolwork, and the importance of household manners are key so we try to enforce those daily. The little dude also happens to be a foodie! So when I don’t feel like cooking he gets to enjoy some of Providence’s best restaurants with us, Los Andes is currently his favorite. So I guess I have a bit of a split life, I get to be a bit of a free-spirit career woman and a step-mom… I get the best of both worlds!
4. On hard days, what motivates you to get up and start your day?
My hard day motivation consists of taking a breather and remembering how far I have come. I spent the majority of my twenties sacrificing experiences and nights out with the girls to accomplish the goals I had set for myself before I turned 30. Happy to say, I was able to accomplish them all. Looking back it wasn’t easy, there were a lot of tears and sweat in the process, but knowing how proud my husband and family are of me keeps me going. As I enter into my 30’s my goals are different, easier in a sense but that isn’t an excuse and mediocrity and complacency is still not an option. So when those difficult days come up… and they do, I remember how hard I worked to get to where I am and nothing has or can stop me from what I truly want for myself. Always remember, discipline creates freedom.
5. Who inspires you to live your best life?
I am inspired by my mother. She was an immigrant from the Cape Verde Islands. Coming to the United States she had to quit school at age 15 to work and support her family. She did this out of necessity despite having dreams to someday have her own “American Dream”. Growing up she made sure I knew sky was the limit and made me promise to never put my education aside and to grow up to have a better life than she did. She has really been a huge driving force in my life, every time I succeed, she succeeds. That, to me, is the best feeling of accomplishment. Seeing her proud of who I have become lets her know that although she had to put her own dreams aside, she still succeed because the dreams she had for her daughter came true. She raised me to be independent, fierce, smart, and driven. I
wouldn’t be who I am today without her.
6. If you could go back and tell your 13 year old self something… what would that be?
It’s okay not to fit in, one day you will be glad you didn’t.
7. What is your favorite quote?
“The woods are lovely, dark, and deep. But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.”
–Robert Frost
9. You are inspiring women to stop hating and start loving themselves and each other, what piece of
advice would you give them?
Personally, I think that self-hate starts with making excuses for ourselves that prevent us from being the best version of ourselves we can be. If you feel that you can be better, then maybe you can. So, what are you waiting for? Perfection is not achievable but excellence is. Your mind, body, and life are things that can be changed. If you are not happy with your mind, feed it positivity, expand your thoughts, learn new topics, tap into the things that make your mind happy. If you are not happy with your body, become active, pick up healthy eating and activity habits. Being physically fit is not just an exterior improvement but also a mental improvement. It instills discipline, strength, and endurance in every aspect of your life… the exterior, to me, is just a bonus. If you are not happy with your life, evaluate the
things and people that make you unhappy and adjust accordingly. Not every status or state in life is permanent nor should just be accepted because “that’s how it is or that’s what happened to me”. No more excuses! There is no better feeling in the world than knowing you are giving 100% into cultivating a new mindset, creating a fulfilling lifestyle, and building the best version of your body. It takes hard work, and sometimes thick skin, however… becoming the best version of YOU is not impossible, so why not do it? Go after it! It’s your life girl, make it the best quality you possibly can. You don’t want to look back at life and know you could have done better or missed some of life’s best experiences because you simply didn’t go after what you wanted. So when you begin to doubt yourself, remember you are
DESERVING, CAPABLE, and STRONG enough to achieve anything you truly want, the question is… how bad do you want it. As it relates to loving one another, society has conditioned us to believe that we should be more like this or have more of that. This can often lead to spite, jealously, or malicious behavior towards the women who happen to have the qualities or traits you’d like to have for yourself. I believe, once you truly fall in love and give your best effort in your own life, the desire to be anything other than your best self actually subsides; in turn allowing room to love others. One cannot begin to love others unless they truly love themselves. It all starts within, ladies. When you love yourself, and find beauty within
yourself, you will see the world as you see yourself… beautifully.
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